Shame, on the other hand, influences actions that are self-destructive and thoughts that are negative and self-deprecating. While guilt and shame are very similar emotions, there are differences between the two, and being able to recognize the differences is vital to your recovery efforts. Guilt is when you feel bad about something that you have done or committed to doing and then did not. For example, maybe you feel guilty guilt and shame in recovery about saying unkind things to someone while you were intoxicated or making a promise to do something and then not following through. Was there a legitimate cause for your past actions that was beyond your control at the time? For example, perhaps you hurt others while you were experiencing untreated mental illness or as the result of active drug or alcohol addiction that you are now making efforts to properly care for.

Forgiving yourself for the ways you have hurt or harmed others will probably be the hardest thing that you will ever have to do in order to heal your shame. In fact, it may be https://ecosoberhouse.com/article/abuse-in-older-adults-a-growing-threat/ the hardest thing you ever have to do in your life. This is especially true if you have repeated the cycle of abuse by harming another person in the same ways you were abused.

Those who have had an active addiction often battle guilt and shame.

Many times we have values because they
were taught to us as children. We don’t think about whether we still believe in our values as
adults. By seeing why you keep these
values and what they really mean to you, you can renew your belief in them. Or
you may discover some values no longer hold true for you and you can discard
them. Either way, you will learn something important about yourself that will
help you keep and maintain a value system.

The practice boosts motivation, optimism, resilience in times of stress or failure. Engaging regularly in self-care activities helps prevent relapse during addiction recovery by helping one cope better with stressors and challenging emotions like shame and guilt. Self-compassion involves treating oneself with understanding and care, just as one would treat a close friend who is suffering. It acknowledges that everyone makes mistakes and experiences difficulties in life. Self-care encompasses activities that people engage in to take care of their physical, emotional, and mental health wellbeing.

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When we are about to do something or actually do something that goes
against this value system, we feel guilty. Guilt warns us that we need to stop
and do something different. Remember that guilt and shame become a vicious cycle when we try to hide the wrongs we have done.